Abusers will stalk you.Abusers will stalk you whenever they can. You will always live in fear of being stalked by him or her if you stay in contact. Sometimes stalking can be a serious and violent crime that can escalate. Most of the time, the stalker is someone you know. But sometimes, it’s someone you’ve never met. This means there’s a high chance your abuser may be one because most stalking incidents happen because of previous relationships. Commonly, men stalk women, but there men and women can stalk the same sex, and women stalk men as well.
Signs of a Stalker.
- They will call you with an unknown number constantly
- They’ll follow you wherever you go, often hiding so you don’t see them.
- You get unexpected gifts that you didn’t want from them.
- The stalker will also email you constantly.
- There might be a tracking app installed on your phone, without your permission.
- Your computer might be hacked, and the person may watch everything that you do.
- You often see the stalker staking out your house.
- He or she threatens harm to you, your children, family, friends, and pets.
- The stalker will do anything they can to get to know you by contacting everyone you know and doing an online search.
- They’ll try to frighten you with other actions they may do.
Here’s how to deal with it.You should know first and foremost, it’s not your fault that you’re being stalked. As you know already, stalking is a crime and that person can be dangerous. No two stalking situations are alike. With that said, what helps one person may not work for you. Regardless, here are the steps that you can take to get out of a potentially dangerous situation.
- Call 911 if you feel there’s immediate danger. These days 911 call centers have GPS that can track where your cell phone is, in case you can’t give out your location. *You’ll still need to give the exact location if it’s safe to do so*
- If you feel something is wrong, trust your instincts. You are most likely right.
- You should take the threats seriously and contact someone as soon as you can to address the threats.
- If you’re in an abusive situation, please contact a crisis hotline, victim services agency, or domestic violence or rape crisis program. A safety plan will be made right away and they can direct you in the right direction as far as obtaining a restraining order.
- Have a safety plan. Make sure there’s a place you can stay at. Make sure people know where you’re at all times, in case you run into trouble at home, school and work.
- Make sure that the stalker can’t communicate with you and of course, don’t respond to him or her.
- You’ll need proof of the stalker stalking you. Keep all messages and pictures handy when you go to get a restraining order. If there’s witnesses who can attest the person is indeed stalking you, make sure you have their contact info.
- It’s important to contact the police as soon as you can. Every state has its own stalking laws and that person may be already violating it.
- Get a court-ordered restraining order as soon as possible. That person will legally have to stay away from you or they could do time.
- You must tell everyone that you can about this stalker. This way, they can look out for you.
Being stalked means you might:
- Live in fear. You feel you don’t know what the stalker will do next.
- Feel more vulnerable and afraid.
- Not trust any new person.
- Feel you’re going insane, more anxious, and even irritable.
- Feel depressed, hopeless, and even angry.
- Feel so stressed out that you can’t eat, sleep or concentrate.
- Develop PTSD because of the stalker’s tendencies or past relationship with the stalker.
- Feel confused most of the time, even ask why does it happen to you.
- Feel isolated and feel like no one understands how you feel.